I offer this work because I know from experience that transformation is possible.
I was born into an atmosphere of terror and rage. We were the 'dysfunctional family' on the street and although our wonderful mum did her best, my siblings and I met with shocking degrees of neglect, poverty, abuse, violence and fear. But from as early on as I can remember I felt a strong sense of knowing that no one was to blame. I couldn't condone the behaviour going on around me, it's true they were responsible for the choices they made, but I could clearly see that they weren't waking up everyday hoping to make our lives sad. I could somehow see that they were caught in a continuation of human pain that stretched way back through generations. And although I was living this drama of my life, I knew it wasn't anything to do with who I really was. I somehow sensed my essential nature was far more wonderful than that.
There was a moment when I was very young, I guess it's what you might call a pivotal moment - I was alone with my mum, she was crying because my dad had beaten her. I tried to comfort her, but felt so helpless, I was so small and my dad was so big and scary. But I knew I had to do something. I was too young to be able to help in any practical sense of the word, so I decided instead, to make a promise to myself. And that promise was to dedicate my life to changing the generational family patterning that had held the people around me in its vice like grip for years. I grew a fierce passion inside me for freeing future generations so they would have the chance of a happier, healthier life. I was so determined. I made a commitment to myself that my own children, should I have them, would never be cold or hungry or harmed.
And so began my passionate inquiry into the nature of reality, into who I really am, and how to bring my gifts to the world.
I married when I was 22 and had my daughter Jane at 24 and my son Tim at 25. These two wonderful beings have been my biggest teachers and I love them with all my heart. Between them, they presented me with a whole raft of physical and emotional health problems that lead me to discovering the wonders of homeopathy and set me off on my career as a therapist. Sadly, my marriage came to an end in 1994, which is no big surprise given how traumatised and shut down I was.
In 1993 my dad committed suicide and in 1996 my mum died from cancer. At this point I packed up an old volvo with a mattress, a bag of clothes, three bicycles and a copy of Pippi Longstocking and moved from London to Somerset where I met my lovely husband, Daniel. In 1997 my children and I joined forces with him and his gorgeous boys, Sam, Joe and Ben. And with the blessing and support of our ex partners the four of us worked tirelessly, as a united force, to manage the complex weekly arrangements. The incredible adults we now see in front of us are a credit to that joint endeavour.
In 2003 I came across my spiritual teacher Adam and really, his teaching and tender guidance changed my world. He brings his gifts with such grace, humour and presence, such patience, tenderness and love that the moment I met him I knew he could guide me from the nightmare of my history, back home to here. My journey to becoming a Children's Author has been so much a part of this unravelling.
I started writing as soon as I could hold a pencil and would spend hours and hours making squiggly marks on a page. I loved the feel of the pencil in my hand and the shape of the squiggles. I loved the sense that my inner most feelings could travel down my arm and be expressed on the page. I now write books about ordinary children who find themselves facing overwhelming situations with little or no support, and in 2010 my dream of becoming a published author came true when HarperCollins published my first book, Shine, quickly followed on by four more books, which you can find out more about here. My books have taken my life on a totally new direction, because as well as writing I now frequently visit schools to give author talks and run writing workshops, all of which I love!
It's clear to me that my books and my talks are the place where my difficult childhood, my passion for writing squiggles on pages, and the insight and understanding I've gained through supporting thousands of people in a therapeutic setting, meet.
I feel so blessed by all and everything my life has become, so inspired by the incredible people I've met along the way. But my greatest inspiration still, is the little girl inside me who worked so hard to keep me safe. I have such reverence for her courage to stand in the face of all that was spread out before her and say, "Enough!"
And so my early commitment to myself to walk a new path and live my own truth, remains. I'm so proud too that my brother and sister, in their own ways, worked tirelessly to break the patterns that wrapped us so tightly in fear. And I'm so happy to say that all three of us raised happier and healthier children than, given where we came from, might ever have been thought possible. We now all have grandchildren and these shiny little beings are a true testament to what's possible in a life. And when I look at them I'm so moved, I have that feeling of 'job well done', as they know nothing of the legacy that might have been theirs.
I began working with people in 1996 after completing my homeopathic training and have since worked with thousands of adults and children, families and couples. Although my original training was in classical homeopathy, transpersonal psychotherapy, and allergy testing, over the years I have acquired an ever expanding toolkit of diverse and fascinating ways to support my clients in their unfolding. In 2003, under the tutelage of Adam the main influence in my work shifted toward using self-inquiry as a way of supporting the process of awakening as embodied consciousness, a non-dualistic perspective, bringing people to a personal realisation of who they truly are. Peace appearing as Energy - Love appearing as Life. I now tend to work intuitively with people, meeting them exactly where they are in their process, working with what interests them most, and in whatever way feels appropriate at the time. Some clients choose to work in one particular way or another, to address a specific difficulty, and this too is fine with me. I am passionate about my work, very committed to what I do and am always left feeling so touched and inspired by the courage and trust people bring to my room.